Hello, I Love You, Won't You Tell Me Your Name?

Hey there! I finally made it back to Manhattan, Kansas. As I was returning back in the car with Mike, I felt very... imprisoned. The first day that I get back to Kansas from California always feels like this. Like I can't escape this "little apple" feeling. I feel kind of trapped. Like I can't leave. It's kind of awful! I always settle back down and once I do I feel fine. But always the first day back.... Bleh. I just miss being in the city. And it's not only that. I miss my family. I love hanging out with my sisters, and they aren't here you know?

Suey told me that there are only a couple of people that she can always laugh incredibly hard with. Those people would be me and Flower. You know what's funny? I feel the same way about her. She's the only person in my life right now that I can laugh deliriously with. I mean, we just GET IT. Joo know? We are pretty much amused by the same things. It sucks to not be able to hang out with Suey whenever I want. And Sarah- she has changed so much! She used to be so incredibly quiet. Even around us. And now she's just a bubble of speech and just so much more open. It's really great. She's really grown! I just heart my sisters. :) Another person I've really come to appreciate is my dad. I knew he was a wise person, but during this trip I found out that he's much more than that. The only person that I have tiffs with are my mother. But even towards the end, she and I were getting along fine. It was probably because I was staying with Suey. As long as I'm not around my mother for extended periods of time, I can tolerate her. Still. Even through all the bad, there is so much good. And I miss them.

I had a fabulous time in California overall... and I'm definitely going to start missing it real soon.... But there's a lot of things I need to accomplish here now. Starting with going back to the gym! I thought I was going to go all the time in California, but that was definitely not the case. In fact, I think I pretty much ate out almost everyday and worked out minimally while I was in California. But I mean, I wasn't going to get to eat In N' Out, sushi, Indian food, PHO... sheesh.. I couldn't help myself. I did go to a yoga class with Suey and worked out a little... but just not the way I wanted to or do here in Kansas. So that's all got to change, starting tomorrow! There's a lot of stuff that Mike and I have to take care of too.. like cleaning out our old apartment, calling the cable guy, getting our AC fixed.. just little things like that you know? So it does really feel good to back, sleeping in my own bed, knowing that I'm going to be able to take care of stuff around the house... being back with my amneemals... so it's not all terrible being back in Manhattan... I just miss things about California already you know? I guess now I know... I won't ever be able to be a small town girl. It's a great experience I think, but I definitely prefer city life.

Anyhoodles! I should sleep.. but I think I'm feeling a little bit of jet lag. Meh. Well... I'll be off. Toodles!!!

P.S. Started a great book: The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. It's something to read when you have time to invest in yourself. It's not a difficult read, but it's something that you have to pay attention to if you want to get anything out of it. I think you also need to have an open heart and mind... But it's definitely worthwhile. :)

Chairlift - Bruises

I'm really loving this song right now.

I tried to do handstands for you
I tried to do headstands for you
Everytime I fell on you
Yeah everytime I fell
I tried to do handstands for you
But everytime I fell for you
I'm permanently black and blue
Permanently blue for you

I tried to do handstands for you
I tried to do headstands for you
Everytime I fell on you
Yeah everytime I fell
I tried to do handstands for you
But everytime I fell for you
I'm permanently black and blue
Permanently blue for

You
For you
So black and blue
For you

I grabbed some frozen strawberries so I could ice your bruising knees
But frozen things they all unfreeze and now I taste like
All those frozen strawberries I used to chill your bruising knees
Hot July ain't good to me
I'm pink and black and blue

I got bruises on my knees for you
And grass stains on my knees for you
Got holes in my new jeans for you
Got pink and black and blue

Got bruises on my knees for you
And grass stains on my knees for you
Got holes in my new jeans for you
Got pink and black and blue for

You
For you
So black and blue
For you

This Is What It Feels Like

Frustrated

I am frustrated. I'm stressed and frustrated from things non-vet school related and I feel like that shouldn't even be an issue!! I should be relaxing and enjoying my summer. But instead, I'm stressed. I'm frustrated with living with my parents. Actually, it's not my parents, it's just my mother. It's SO stressful to live with this woman, who is always, ALWAYS trying to convince me to do something. Stupid little things.. like eating certain foods or trying to convince me to change the way I drive. I don't need someone trying to convince me to do it another way. Every conversation I have with her is like talking to a child. It's infuriating.

Example
Mom: Try this vegetable. It's soooo good.
Me: I don't want it.
Mom: But just try it. It's really yummy. And it's good for you.
Me: I don't want to eat it.
Mom: Just eat one bite. It has lots of vitamins. It will make your skin better.
Me: I DON'T WANT TO EAT IT.
Mom: But how do you know if you don't want it if you haven't tried it?
Me: I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE EATING IT.
Mom: But if you try it, you will like it.
Me: I JUST DON'T WANT TO FREAKIN' EAT IT!!!!
[conversation ends with me yelling the last sentence]

Pretty much, every conversation we have is of this nature. And my mom wonders why I scream at her to just STOP. It's AWFUL to argue with someone about a different topic in the same way, every single freakin' time. [sigh].. I just need to scadattle from this house...

Nobody Knows Where They Might End Up

Halo! I've been in the lovely and wretched company of California for a few days now. I flew in Sunday night... so I've been here for about a week now. I've been staying with my parents and Sarah in Corona, and surprisingly, I've been surviving it pretty well. First night back, we went to go eat soondubu @ Tofu Villa near where Suey lives so she could meet up with us. The next day Sarah and I went to watch Land of the Lost, which wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It wasn't great, just okay, but I enjoyed it. Our parents watched The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3. I've also been watching excessive amounts of Grey's with Sarah. Finally finished Season 2 that Theresa let me borrow and started renting Season 3 today.

Yesterday I went to go help Ben and Jon paint their new house. After a pretty good day of painting and working on the house, Ben and I went to 24 to work out. I know Mike thinks jogging on the treadmill is a waste... and I know it's true, but I also like it, so I went again and jogged a couple of miles on the treatmill. It was actually a nice night out, so I could have gone jogging outside, but... oh vell. Afterwards we went to eat at California Shabu Shabu in Costa Mesa. SO yummy! It was great seeing Ben and Jon. We picked up his uncle who also helped paint, and he was staying with Ben's grandma so I got to see her too! She's wonderful. Absolutely the cutest grandma you would ever encounter. She's so sweet. She kept hugging me because it had been so long since I'd seen her. I was afraid she wouldn't remember me, but she did. She gave me a peach. Which totally reminded me of one of my favorite cards.

Today Sarah and I went to the 24 in Corona and I made her do some interval training. She didn't really like that, but I made her do it anyway. :) I picked up a schedule while I was there... they have yoga on Mondays and Wednesdays so I want to go to those. We rented and watched Made of Honor.. a not so great movie. As much I love Patrick Dempsey, it wasn't the best movie... It pretty much has the same plot as My Best Friend's Wedding, except that My Best Friend's Wedding is an awesome movie and Made of Honor is very so so.

Tomorrow I'm taking my parents and Sarah hiking at Santa Anita Loop. It's one of my most favorite hiking spots in So Cal. Can't wait! :)

Plans: Saturday - 4th of July! Suey coming to hang out. SD to parent's store. Sunday - kyaking with the girls and dinner with Kazu. Monday - LA with parents. Tuesday - help Ben and Jon. Wednesday - dinner with Rene. Thursday - ??? Friday - Maria and Mark's party. Saturday - VEGAS!! Sunday - return home.. Dates to be set: Art museum with Sarah and Ben, Funky Sole night with anyone who is willing to dance the night away!!


I love this oil painting.. I really want a copy of it.. Isn't it beautiful? What do you see when you look at it? 2 women? A man and a woman? I'm not really sure.. Ciao for now..