Dear Tobey,
I know I always start off this way, but apologies for having disappeared again for such a long while. Turns out, life with kids is a constant full-time never ending job. Sometimes I think about how easy life would have been without kids. Then I wonder the opposite too, if my life would actually be super boring with the kids... I suppose there are pros and cons to both scenarios, and everyone has to make these judgement calls themselves. Then there are people who don't get the choice because they are biologically unable to have children, etc. So all in all, I should consider myself lucky.
I do constantly worry about the future of the kids though... here is a myriad of thoughts that go through my mind at any given time:
1) Will they be successful enough to be able to provide for themselves when they are adults? Or could they end up homeless, on the streets, drug addicts...
2) Could my kids ever die in some freak accident or be murdered by a serial killer or their future partner?
3) Will the world implode from all the badness humans do to this planet... I hear people complaining about plastic bags having disappeared, now replaced by paper bags... and I wonder how if society can't let go of these small changes, how we can ever make the world a better place...
4) I wonder if I should tell my children to not have children because of 3...
5) I wish I had my kids younger so I could be around for them longer... I worry if they have kids, how hard it will be for them without generational help if we are already gone. Because I know how hard it is and how lucky I am to have had that help from my mom to raise my children.
6) I wonder if I really should start my own clinic later this year to actually make some real money. Working for someone else is never going to cut it if we want to live comfortably in southern California.
Those are my ramblings for now.. see you again later, hopefully sooner than last time!
<3 Karen
